Thursday, April 1, 2010

Dreams Of Joshua

Within the first year after Joshua's suicide, I dreamed three dreams that were like real time here on Earth. I don't want to get weird on my readers, but they simply were not the normal dreams. That is the truth. Could it be because of whom I was dreaming about? Maybe. Did I create three dreams that were like a living breathing moment?

The first dream went like this. Joshua had no wound from his fatal shot. He came up to me, but wouldn't let me touch him. He smiled and said, "Mom, I'm okay. Really, I am." And he kept walking on by.

When I woke, it both disturbed and soothed me. He looked so like Joshua, but I was upset I could not touch his hand.

The next dream he was laughing and smiling. We talked but I don't remember now what we said. The last dream, he told me he had a girlfriend. Well, that is strange, but I woke happy that my son seemed happy.

I don't have a clue as to why those dreams were so real. I've had many of Joshua, but none like these. The regular dreams were just that . . . dreams. The others were more like visions.

Whatever those three dreams were, they comforted one very distraught mother. I needed that reassurance, even if I created it all on my own. It is after all, a mother's longing to know her children are doing well.

On this last journey my son has taken that will never end? I believe we will be reunited one day in heaven. Not a fact, though, for only God can judge.

"For whosoever believeth in him [God] should not perish but have everlasting life." John 3:16 KJV

I hope my ramblings help. I pray they do.

Until next time . . .

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