Saturday, May 29, 2010

Joshua Would Laugh


On a lighter note about our loss of Joshua to suicide, recently the rain here in Oregon has been nonstop. I don't mean twenty-four hours a day, but rather raining off and on everyday for two weeks.

At first, my husband worked outdoor chores in between rains. No problem. Then, things turned comical. As soon as he started the job, like cutting wood, here came the rain just a pouring down. Jim came inside with a perplexed look.

As soon as he settled in at his computer or to read a woodworking magazine, the rain stopped and even the sun peeked. Out he'd go, again. A few minutes later Jim came in a bit soaked. This happened at least a half a dozen times.

I would tease, "Honey, go outside, my garden needs more rain."

Joshua would have gotten a good laugh at his dad's comical situation. We imagined, and we know it's just for fun, Joshua asking the Lord to allow it to rain down on his dad.

Instead of becoming upset that rain just needs to do its business, we brought our son into the situation and smiled. If Josh were here, he would have laughed at his dad. No doubt.

I remember the last time Joshua laughed. One week before he took his life, I was in a tiff. About what, I don't remember. Jim and Joshua followed me toward the opened garage door. In the entryway, my foot landed on a propped up steel rake. Bang. The handle of the rake hit me on the nose. I cried out in pain. Joshua laughed. His jolly moment made me even angrier. How dare he laugh when I pert near broke my nose.

Later that night, I touched the sore spot and winched. Then, I smiled to think my little accident made Joshua laugh out loud. I couldn't remember the last time I heard his echoing laughter.

Today, I am considering the scripture from James 5:8, "Be ye also patient; stablish your hearts: for the coming of the Lord draweth nigh."

Until next time . . . I pray, you pray, let's all pray.

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