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| photo and heart cake by Jean Ann Williams |
“O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth
shall shew forth thy praise.”
—Psalm 51:15 KJV
On Valentine’s
Day morning I sat alone at the kitchen table after my husband left for work.
I played through
my mind last year’s Valentine’s dinner with Joshua. It was the first time my
husband and I had gone out to dinner for Valentine’s Day, and we asked Joshua
along. He had accepted our invitation.
I believe Joshua
knew he would leave us soon. Did he want his dad and me to have the memory of
us three eating out at our favorite restaurant? Joshua hated the long wait in
line, clear outside to the sidewalk. But once we were seated inside, he relaxed
and enjoyed the meal. Of course, he stayed quiet, as was his habit in the few
years before his death.
I bowed my head,
then, done with remembering. I vowed to spend the day in prayer, Bible reading,
and thankful praise for the time we had with Joshua last Valentine’s Day.
Dear Lord, I miss my sweetheart son. I miss
our shared meals together. I miss his quiet demeanor. Most of all, I miss his
glorious laugh that had grown infrequent in the last years of his life. In
Jesus’s holy name, I praise You. Amen.
A Mother’s
Memories
Jami placed the
cracker near my mouth and said, “Come on, Mom, you have to eat this cracker and
one more.”
Nausea covered
me, and I turned my face away. “I’ll throw up.”
She sighed and
walked over to Joshua. “You heard the nurse. Mom can’t leave until she eats
this.”
Joshua held out
his hand. “Let me try.” He stood next to the bed. “Mom, you have to eat this
silly cracker or they won’t let you out.”
Family members in
the room chuckled. Joshua’s way of putting things almost made me laugh, but I
couldn’t even smile. Instead, I decided to do what he said, for his efforts.
He held the
cracker to my lips. “Open up.”
As I nibbled on
the tasteless thing, my family decided to go to lunch. When Joshua didn’t make
a move to leave, my husband asked, “Are you coming, Son?”
Joshua shoved his
hands in his jeans pocket. “I’m staying with Mom. Gotta make sure she eats the
other cracker.”
Ten minutes after
they left, the nurse came in and asked if I’d eaten the two crackers. When I nodded,
she said, “Do you have a ride, Mrs. Williams?”
Joshua spoke
before I could answer, “Yes. I’ll take my mom home.”
After the
forty-five-minute drive, Joshua helped me to our sofa. He set down a glass of
water to my right and covered me with blankets. He put in a movie, and we were
halfway through it when my husband came home. His face was pale from worry. “We
went back to get you and you were gone.”
Joshua looked
over at his dad. “I took care of her.”
Father, thank You for Joshua’s presence and
care for me after my surgery. Thank You for creating my son. In Jesus’s holy
name. Amen.
Reader Journal
~Your Mother Memories~
~Your Prayer of Praise~
~A Scripture of Encouragement~
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