God's Mercies after Suicide: Blessings Woven through a Mother's Heart~The Devotion and A Mother's Memories~A Mother Like Me

photo by Jean Williams~A Mountain Cliff

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart. Oh, God, thou wilt not despise.”

—Psalm 51:17 KJV

Jason’s wife told me about a friend of hers who had lost a son.

My daughter-in-law gave me Margaret’s phone number and encouraged me to call. I held on to the number, and weeks later I gathered my courage. Kind and easy to talk with, Margaret shared with me her loss and told me about The Compassionate Friends organization.

Margaret gave me the number of the woman who put out The Compassionate Friend’s regional newsletter. That lady had lost a son to suicide just as I had. Margaret said the lady would help me find a place of understanding.

Setting the phone onto its cradle, I sensed a hope. Within The Compassionate Friends, there were other parents like us? Yes, even those who suffered the sorrow of losing a child to suicide.

Oh, my dear Lord. You have shown me I am not alone in my sorrowing. You bring about good from sorrow. In Jesus’s holy name, I thank You. Amen.

A Mother’s Memory

When Joshua was three years old, our family took a vacation, and we stopped in the state of Colorado.

When we drove over a bridge with a river underneath, we poked our heads out the car window to see thousands of feet down. We craned our necks up at the tall rocks that peaked just short of the clouds. As it was getting late, we drove to the top of one such bluff to camp for the night.

Everyone piled out of the car, and we stood in awe. Land spread out down below for miles and miles. Our children clustered together, pointing and exclaiming how high we were over the world.

Suddenly, Joshua broke away from his siblings. He ran toward the edge.

Jason’s swift legs ran after his baby brother. Jason grabbed Joshua before he reached the edge to fall thousands of feet to his death. How Jason knew there was no fence for protection, I’ll never know. Jim and I thought it was fenced. Coming from a state that fenced all dangerous sightseeing areas, we were shaken to tears to find nothing but air where Joshua was headed.

I believe Joshua’s guardian angel prompted Jason to save his little brother from sure death.

Oh, Lord, I am grateful, so very grateful You allowed Your angels to nudge Jason into action. We were able to keep Joshua for twenty-two more years. In Jesus’s name. Amen.

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